Battle of the Pants, by David Arkwright
The three brothers of the kingdom of Geneternia each had their own region over which they reigned.
Dropsy Nut held sway over the lowlands, just north of the Valley of Death. Dong Johnson could be found to the west, surveying his domain of Middle Girth from beneath his helmet. And if you were to follow a course North West of here you would come across the proud figure of Lofty Ball of Peeyab.
Until ‘Y’ day. It filled the sky above Geneternia, throwing the territories into turmoil, and pitting brother against brother in a battle for supremacy.
The first blow was struck by Lofty. As Dong encroached on his personal space he retaliated, sweeping beneath him and heaving him upside down. But this shift in the balance of power did not go unnoticed by Dropsy. Seeing his Lofty creep forward through the undergrowth he feared being beaten back to the valley below. He acted decisively, and with a mighty shove sent lofty back, up the gusset and on, over the taught rim! Lofty seized his chance of freedom and popped out.
But the rush of triumph was quenched as he was crushed twixt thigh and gusset. Pain lanced through him, and he fell back into Geneternia defeated.
Weary of the battle, Dong decided to end the conflict swiftly. He drew himself up to his full terrifying five and a half inches, and forced the pair apart. The battle of ‘Y’ day was over, but the war had just begun.